LGBTP advocates love to tell us that since “homosexuality” occurs in the animal kingdom, it’s therefore natural for men to bugger other men up the arse while decked from head to toe in black latex.

The big problem with this argument – other than that no one should aspire to be like animals in the first place – is that “homosexual” animals, on the rare occasions when they could be classified as such, tend to be just as anti-social and dysfunctional as human ones.

The two gay penguins in China’s Polar Land are good examples. Unable to conceive eggs naturally, these two flightless poofters stole eggs from normal parents and, presumably hoping to conceal their child-snatching ways, replaced them with rocks.

Sounds like TFB (Typical Fag Behavior) to me.

This week, another incident occurred that reminds us that all gays – even aquatic ones – are social outcasts whose behavior is at odds with the natural order.

New York Post:

A pair of gay male swans have been taken to an animal reserve after attacking several people at an Austrian lake.

The swans were apparently protecting their nest, which, as opposed to an egg, contained a colorful plastic cup, Nachrichten reports.

Good Lord. What is it with gays and colorful things?

There are plenty of regular plastic cups around. Even Starbucks cups are pretty plain-looking:

But no. That isn’t “super” enough for these feathered rump rangers.

They have to be the most flamboyant queens on the lake.

The aggressive behavior started last summer, according to Kleine Zeitung. This summer, they became even more belligerent according to Franz Steinegger, mayor of Grundlsee. The pair have “attacked everything that came their way,” both on the shore and in the water, he told Kleine Zeitung. “They have thrown themselves on the swimmers, trying to submerge them.”

Some bathers even suffered cuts that required hospital treatment.

Mayor Steinegger resisted calls to euthanize the angry birds, opting instead to call in wildlife experts to remove the swans. Wildlife specialist Alexander Groder caught both birds last week and took them to a reserve in Austria’s Tyrol region, where their aggression has apparently subsided.

Visitors should be glad that this incident occurred in )))Austria((( rather than (((Germany))). Had this been a German lake, the local government would want to add more gay swans to the lake to increase diversity.

Plus a sizable number of black swans, of course.

But seriously

I’m not convinced that genuine homosexuality exists in the animal kingdom. Most of the time, zoologists focus on animals that have been kept in unnatural conditions, such as zoos, which screw with their instincts (and that’s assuming a lot of these “gay relationships” aren’t exaggerated or simply made up for political purposes).

Moreover, we cannot understate the significance of environmental factors, especially the presence of BPA-containing plastics, in contributing toward this aberrant behavior. Aquatic animals are particularly susceptible to endocrine disruption, since plastic is always finding its way into our waters. I mean, these two swans were nursing a plastic cup ffs. That tells us a lot about the state of this park.

I’m going to go on a limb here and state that if these swans were living in a wild, pristine environment as nature intended, they probably wouldn’t be gay and treating inanimate objects as eggs.

Just a hunch ‘n’ all.

POLICE are hunting for a man who allegedly beheaded a swan before taking it home to eat.

The man, was caught on camera by a fishing pal of local wildlife lover Steve Robinson last week, who immediately handed the image to the police.

Mr Robinson claims the man was seen stuffing the lifeless body of a swan into his red and black rucksack at 18-acre Bennett’s Lake in Hildenbough, Kent.

Mr Robinson said: “This b*****d is killing swans in the Tonbridge area, here he is after putting one in his bag.”

The killer is believed to have enticed the bird out of the water with breadcrumbs.

Mr Robinson said a friend of his was fishing at the popular lake when he spotted the man attack the swan last Tuesday at around 4pm, cutting its head off at the bottom of the neck so it would fit in his rucksack.

He said he rushed over to him to tell him to stop, but that it was too late and the swan had been decapitated and put in the rucksack.

Mr Robinson said the man “ran off” when he realised he had been rumbled.

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