This is so, so funny to me.

CNN:

Olympic medalist Ryan Lochte and three other US swimmers were safe and cooperating with police Sunday after being robbed at gunpoint in Rio de Janeiro, the U.S. Olympic Committee said.

One of the bandits reportedly put a gun to Lochte’s forehead.

Lochte and fellow swimmers Gunnar Bentz, Jack Conger and Jimmy Feigen had left a hospitality house hosted by France early Sunday in a taxi bound for the Olympic Village.

The vehicle was “stopped by individuals posing as armed police officers who demanded the athletes’ money and other personal belongings,” said USOC spokesman Patrick Sandusky.

Appearing on NBC, Lochte offered chilling details.

“We got pulled over, in the taxi, and these guys came out with a police badge, no lights, no nothing — just a police badge and they pulled us over,” Lochte told NBC. “They pulled out their guns, they told the other swimmers to get down on the ground — they got down on the ground. I refused, I was like we didn’t do anything wrong, so — I’m not getting down on the ground.

“And then the guy pulled out his gun, he cocked it, put it to my forehead and he said, ‘Get down,’ and I put my hands up, I was like ‘whatever.’ He took our money, he took my wallet — he left my cell phone, he left my credentials.”
“I think they’re all shaken up,” Lochte’s mother, Ileana Lochte, told USA Today.

Lochte released a statement thanking family, friends, and fans for their support.

“While it is true that my teammates and I were victims of a robbery early Sunday morning, what is most important is that we are safe and unharmed,” he said.

Everyone thinks Micheal Phelps is a pretty cool guy.

But then they find out his son’s name is “Boomer.”

Like Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Boomer Esiason, except that Boomer Esiason’s real name was “Norman Julius Esiason” (which is also sort of gross, I guess, probably), and “Boomer” was a nickname.

Norman Julius Esiason, master race confirmed.

Michael Phelps son’s birth certificate says “Boomer Phelps.”

Is nothing sacred anymore?

Also, the mother appears to be some kind of welfare-mongering burrito scarfer.

It appears then that Boomer and his spic mother have a serious problem on their hands.

But all of this brings us to the real question at hand:

Is Michael Phelps some sort of autistic retard?

The answer, of course, is a resounding “yes.”

I ain’t even trying to rain on yall’s parade.

I’m just sayin somethin done needed sayin.

Brown countries are such a joke.

Erebuddy be gitten robbed out der in da Rio.

Breitbart:

The latest high-profile victim of a violent robbery in Rio de Janeiro is Yevgeny Korotyshkin, an Olympic silver medalist and the president of the Moscow Swimming Federation. He joins Portugal’s Minister of Education and the head of security for the 2016 Olympic Games in having experienced a mugging while traveling between Olympic venues.

Korotyshkin posted about his robbery on the social media network Instagram. “This post is not about sports, but how they failed,” he wrote Wednesday. “Walk toward the Bar Astor in Ipanema, I was robbed. All is well with me, they separated from me amicably.”

Korotyshkin describes the incident as an “emotional story” and notes the amicable departure was due to him handing over all his valuables.

Ipanema is considered one of the more upscale and safe neighborhoods in Rio de Janeiro, though locals have recently increasingly protested that they no longer feel safe there.

Korotyshkin accompanied his message with an image of Brazilian youth holding firearms and smiling, which some media outlets have reported as an image of the robbers in question; it is actually a Los Angeles Times photo from a feature about Rio de Janeiro’s notorious favela slums.

Korotyshkin’s is the latest in a series of similar incidents. On Saturday, Tiago Brandão Rodrigues, Portugal’s education minister, was robbed at gunpoint leaving an Olympic cycling event. He did not lose any of his belongings, as locals tackled the robbers and detained them until police could arrive; one of the robbers had to be hospitalized after the incident, but Rodrigues escaped unscathed. Rodrigues described the incident as a “fright” but little more and asked observers not to judge the Olympics through the lens of this crime. Shortly before that attack, robbers targeted Felipe Seixas, the head of Olympics security. As Seixas traveled with undercover police, one robber was immediately shot and killed, while the rest sped away on bicycles. There has not been a report that the assailants have been caught.

Athletes, particularly foreigners, have been the target of robberies for weeks since their descent into Rio de Janeiro to train for the Olympics. Two Australian Paralympians were robbed at gunpoint while training weeks before the event. An international jiu-jitsu champion was abducted and forced to take money out of an ATM shortly after that incident; Jason Lee of New Zealand asserted that his kidnappers were members of the Military Police.

Jonas Junius just came to Brazil to find a better life for his fambly.

The disaster that is Rio 2016 continues!

This Olympic Village must have some HOT MAIDS!

Sky Sports:

Namibian boxer Jonas Junius has been arrested on suspicion of a sexual assault in the Olympic Village, Rio police have confirmed.

Junius, a light-welterweight who was due to fight Hassan Amzile in the first round on Thursday, has been detained after allegedly attempting to grab and kiss a maid

The alleged incident took place on Monday night and Junius, Namibia’s flag bearer at the opening ceremony of the Olympics on Friday night, was taken to the nearest police station in Recreio for questioning.

A statement on the Rio civil police’s official website said: “Recreio police said yesterday, August 7, that Jonas Junius was arrested.

“Jonas tried to grab and kiss a maid who managed to extricate herself. The incident occurred on the 11th floor of the hall in building two of the Olympic Village.”

The International Boxing Association (AIBA), amateur boxing’s world governing body, is aware of the incident.

A spokesman for AIBA said: “AIBA has taken note of the serious allegations towards a Namibian boxer who was due to compete at the Rio 2016 Olympic Games.

…

If charged, the suspect will be detained in Bangu prison, where Moroccan Hassan Saada has been held since Friday.

The Moroccan also attempted to rape some maids.

In funnier news, the US women’s soccer team was met with anti-gay chants.

Huffington Post:

It wasn’t just cheers that greeted several Olympic women’s soccer tournament players at the opening matches in Rio de Janeiro last week, but also blatant homophobia.

Three members of the U.S. Women’s National Team said a number of Brazilian spectators told them that fans were chanting “Zika,” a mocking reference to the viral pandemic, as well as “bicha,” which is apparently an anti-gay slur comparable to “faggot” and used toward men, the Los Angeles Times reports. The chant was allegedly heard during the U.S. team’s Aug. 3 victory over New Zealand, as well as the Australia vs. Canada match that same day.

The use of the slur is particularly distressing given the number of out players on those teams. U.S. midfielder Megan Rapinoe came out as a lesbian in 2012 in an Out magazine interview, while four players in the Australia vs. Canada match, including goalie Stephanie Labbé, have also publicly identified as LGBT, Outsports reports. Jill Ellis, who coaches the U.S. team, is also a lesbian.

In not so funny news – or should I say EVEN FUNNIER news – the White retards who went to Brazil like “we be botta wetch us da olampigs” are getting robbed left and right on the street in broad daylight.

Everyone be gits robbed out dis bitch.

What’s more, the locals are interrupting the events with their local monkey political nonsense that no one in the world even knows about, let alone cares about.

I guess they should have hired Whites to carry the stretcher!

Brown people fail even at that!

USA Today:

Tragic French gymnast Samir Ait Said suffered further indignity after his devastating leg injury on Saturday – Olympics staffers dropped his stretcher as they were loading him into an ambulance.

A worldwide audience was horrified when Ait Said’s left leg snapped as he landed a vault during the men’s qualifying competition, with the lower half of his shin dangling grotesquely after the bone audibly snapped.

His ordeal took another bad turn follow minutes later when he was removed from the auditorium to be rushed to a Rio hospital, where he remained late Saturday. As staff moved the 26-year-old’s stretcher towards the edge of the ambulance floor, they appeared to lose control, sending it falling heavily to the floor.

While Ait Said was little known in the United States before the incident that earned him the sympathy of millions, he is a popular figure in his homeland.

At least with a broken leg, Ait Said won’t be able to sexually assault the maids!

Or maybe he will???

Here’s the leg-break video (WARNING: IT’S INTENSE):

No one ever could have pegged this guy as a rapist. It really comes straight out of left-field.

The most diverse Olympics in history has begun, and we are not disappointed!

We’ve got an attempted double-rape!

Daily Mail:

A Moroccan boxer has been arrested on suspicion of attempting to rape two chambermaids in the Olympic Village in Brazil.

Hassan Saada was detained by police this morning over claims he attempted to sexually assault the two women in the athletes’ accommodation at Barra de Tijuca.

The 22-year-old athlete will miss out of competing in the games following allegations that he sexually assaulting two Brazilian domestic maids at the Olympic Village.

Saada, a light heavyweight boxer, was taken to a police station close the Olympic Stadium where he was stripped of his Olympic competitor status.

Detective Caroline Solomon of Recreio Police confirmed the athlete has been stripped of his credentials.

Solomon said officers are doing forensic examinations and other athletes will be questioned as part of their investigations.

According to Solomon, the boxer, who is married, was sharing the room with other athletes.

Both women were ‘frightened and angry’ Solomon said.

She said the penalty, if convicted, is between six and 10 years.

He will be transferred later today to a remand prison in the Polinter district of Rio de Janeiro where he will formally questioned about the allegations.

Investigating judge Larissa Nunes Saly has ruled the athlete will be held in custody for 15 days while police investigate the allegations against him.

According to Rio Police Saada is accused of attacking the two maids on Tuesday morning.

Police say he invited one of the women to pose for a selfie with him and he asked her if she had a profile on social media.

Then he pushed the woman up against the wall and tried to kiss her, it is claimed.

He is also accused of sexually assaulting the second woman by groping her breasts and made sexually-graphic gestures towards the maid and offered her money to perform a sex act upon him.

Judge Nunes Saly has formally contacted the Moroccan Ambassador about the allegations.

She told O Globo newspaper: ‘It has been necessary to arrest Hassan Saada to investigate the allegations against him. If he was at liberty there would be a risk that he could interfere with witnesses. And there is a risk that Hassan Saada could reoffend.’

The judge said Brazilian laws apply to everyone – Brazilians and visitors alike. Everyone must obey the law.

lol @ expecting Moslems to obey sex crimes laws.

Brown people are so stupid.

We here at the Daily Stormer are looking forward to more fun times at the diverse Olympics, which began yesterday.

Among other things, everyone is expected to get infected with Zika, and bring it back to their home countries. There is also going to be much more violence, and probably some form of terrorism.

Maybe, this event will jog a few minds, as it is putting the incompetence of the brown races on full display in a way that it never really has been before in history.

A “refugee” Olympic team has been formed to guilt White people into accepting more Negro and Arab filth in their lands.

The Russians have been banned from the Rio 2016 Olympic games but a group of so-called “refugees” will be allowed to compete. This has never happened before in the history of a games meant to be a friendly athletic competition between nations.

This whole concept is retarded. It is a poor attempt to guilt White people into accepting an unlimited number of savages into their lands. If these athletes were truly poor and disenfranchised “refugees”, they would not be in a position to compete in an athletics competition.

From UNHRC:

Since the modern Olympics began in 1896, over 200 national teams have vied for glory at the Summer and Winter Games. Now, for the first time, a team of refugees will compete as well.

At the 2016 Summer Games in Rio de Janiero, 10 refugee athletes from four countries will compete together as the Refugee Olympic Team. Among them are two swimmers, two judokas, a marathoner and five medium-distance runners.

Their athletic prowess and resilience is a tribute to the courage and perseverance of all refugees – at a time when the number of people displaced by violence and persecution is at the highest level since the Second World War.