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featured stories June 19, 2024 Andrew Anglin

Dudes Have Microplastic in Their Penises (It’s the Only Problem on Earth That Can’t be Solved by Windmills or Wars)

Three guesses where this is sourced from. First two don’t count. Only one major English outlet releases stories about microplastics with any regularity, and that is the Guardian. The Washington…

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featured stories June 11, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

All Tested Human Semen Samples Contain Microplastics, Scientists Say

Babies are now conceived with microplastics as a part of their bodies. But never you mind, goy – the real problem is cows farting and changing the weather. This whole…

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featured stories May 30, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

American Girls Getting First Period Increasingly Earlier Over Last 50 Years

Y’all know what this means. Nature is correcting for the population de— No, sorry, I’m not making that joke. I hate to disappoint you, but I’m not making that joke.…

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us May 21, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

Plastics Found Inside Every Human Testicle Examined in Study

At what point do humans become more plastic than man? The Guardian: Microplastics have been found in human testicles, with researchers saying the discovery might be linked to declining sperm…

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featured stories April 2, 2024 Snake Baker

Microplastics Can Give You Heart Attacks and Strokes

Yes, yes. Whatever. The real environmental crisis is that cow farts are changing the weather. Microplastics in your body are simply part and parcel of living in a utopia. Nordic…

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us March 30, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

Appeals Court Overturns EPA’s Ban on Toxic Plastic Containers

Hahahaha. American justice is at it again! Gigantic corporations have an absolute right to poison you! You cannot infringe on the rights of corporations to poison you, because that is…

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featured stories March 16, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

Thousands of “Highly Hazardous” Plastic Chemicals Still Unregulated, Report Finds

We are basically more plastic than human at this point. We do our best to avoid as much as possible… but it’s just really not possible to avoid that much…

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featured stories February 29, 2024 Snake Baker

Scientists Test Placentas, Find Microplastics in Every Single Sample

There’s a gazillion of these inside you No one chooses to have plastic inside of their bodies. Why do these petrochemical companies, and the retailers that distribute their products, have…

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featured stories February 18, 2024 Andrew Anglin

Plastic Recycling is a Scam

You have to incinerate plastic. There is no other solution to it. If you don’t burn it, it goes into the water, and into your body. It cannot be recycled…

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featured stories February 7, 2024 Elvis Dunderhoff

Plastics in Foods Causing Premature Births and Shrinking Penises

Why is it legal to poison people? We need to get to the bottom of this. The argument is generally going to be that people are choosing to use these…

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