Joshua Banana and Kim Jenner.

Well.

Sometimes the jokes just write themselves, don’t they?

BBC:

A woman who was raped said a police smear test “potentially saved my life” after it found pre-cancerous cells.

Kim Jenner, 26, waived her right to anonymity after her attacker Joshua Banana, 27, was jailed at Derby Crown Court on Thursday.

Ms Jenner said she had “been through hell” since the rape in April 2018.

But she said had been treated “with sensitivity” by police, and the early treatment of the cells was a “silver lining of this horrendous experience”.

Banana, of Leaper Street, Derby, had denied rape but was found guilty.

He was jailed for 10 years and nine months for the attack at a house in Derby, and drugs offences.

…

As well as rape, Banana was convicted of conspiracy to supply a class B drug.